Answer in Details
Your feelings and questions are deeply meaningful, and they resonate with many seekers on the path of Lord Shiva. Shiva, often called the "Lord of the Heart," is beyond rigid forms and rituals. In his teachings and philosophy, devotion (bhakti) is not limited to outward practices like chanting or singing; it is about sincerity, inner connection, and the purity of your heart.
Shiva himself is known as the "Adiyogi"—the first yogi—who taught that the ultimate worship is inner transformation and self-realization. In the Shiva Sutras, it is said:
"Chittam mantrah" (Consciousness itself is mantra).
This means that your true intent, love, and remembrance of Shiva in your heart are the highest forms of worship. Even if you do not chant mantras or sing bhajans, your genuine love and respect for Shiva is enough. The Bhagavad Gita, which is respected in Shaivism as well, says:
"Patram pushpam phalam toyam yo me bhaktya prayacchati"
("Whatever is offered to Me with love, even a leaf, a flower, a fruit, or water—I accept that.")
Shiva is known as "Bholenath," the innocent Lord, who accepts the simplest offerings and the purest intent. If you remember him with love, even in silence, that is a true prayer.
So, not following traditional forms does not mean you do not believe, respect, or love Shiva. Each devotee has a unique relationship with the divine. Shiva teaches us to be authentic. If your connection is silent, inward, or contemplative, it is still valid and deeply meaningful.
If you wish, you can simply sit quietly, remember Shiva, and offer your thoughts or feelings to him. That itself is a beautiful prayer.